- Trump is never gonna be able to defeat the Cyber if he can’t even beat a 2005 video-recorder.
- Billy Bush apologized and said he was younger and less mature back then. (He was 33.)
- Sunday Night’s debate should get moved to Cinemax.
- Trump just got one of those Facebook messages that prompt you to “share this memory from 11 years ago with your followers.”
- The October surprise will be if Trump is still on the ballot in November.
- If this doesn’t bring Marc Andreessen back to Twitter, nothing will.
- Somewhere, Anthony Weiner is quietly plotting his next run for office…
- For the first time in decades, the Bush family is going to invite Billy to Thanksgiving dinner. Think about it. Billy Bush had a bigger impact on the election than Jeb Bush.
- Trump ruined Tic Tacs. His son ruined Skittles. This is a war on candy.
- Forget being elected President of the United States. Donald couldn’t even get elected president of the Trump Tower Co-op Board at this point.
- Gary Johnson just released a statement: “Pussy?”
- Tonight, I’m going to let my kids walk in on me taking bong hits and watching porn. Anything to distract them from asking about Trump. (And I thought Mike Pence saying “I spend a little time on my knees each day” would be the dirtiest part of the campaign.)
- First Lochte… Now Trump… Billy Bush is the Douche Whisperer.
- Trump referred to his comments as locker room banter. Here was some typical banter from my high school football locker room. Coach: “OK, men. Let’s hit the field and win this game.” Me: “I’ll be out in a few minutes. I think I have a little diarrhea again.”
- Here’s a new one: Furniture as an aphrodisiac.
- Sadly for Trump, the rest of his campaign has also been caught on tape.
