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Will you enact gun control?

No.

Why not?

Not now.

Even after a mass murder?

Don’t politicize that.

Aren’t you a politician?

Now you’re gonna politicize that?

How about now?

No. Now is not the time.

But a lot of people just got killed with guns. Isn’t now precisely the time?

Can I get back to you?

How about after Sandy Hook?

No.

Not even after all those kids?

Nope.

Virginia Tech.

No.

Aurora?

No.

San Bernardino?

No can do.

Orlando?

Nope.

How about just the assault weapons?

Nah.

But they’re called assault weapons for a reason right?

Yes. But no.

How about Las Vegas? 59 Killed. 500 injured. One guy shooting. Now?

No.

Why not.

It’s too late. At this point there are too many guns on the street.

Dave Pell writes NextDraft. (His only automatic weapon is a typewriter.)

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